Isaac Bonewits

I have been reading this morning about Isaac Bonewit's illness and approaching death. This brought home to me two things - First, the amazing ability of the Internet to connect people over great distance. Isaac and his wife Phaedra (which is an awesome name) are receiving so much support through Facebook, and through other digital channels as well. Prior to Facebook, I might not have even heard about this until after the fact. Because of Facebook, hundreds, maybe even thousands, of people who have benefited from his teachings can say goodbye. Or, since we're Pagans, see you later.

Second, it reminded me of something I was reading in Truth or Dare by Starhawk earlier this week. She talks about being fed spiritually by other cultures, and then giving back to those cultures. The example was if you participate in a Native American sweat lodge, you then have a duty to care about issues affecting Native Americans. If you don't, then you're a taker and a thief.

I am not a member of Ar nDraiocht Fein, but I have been fed spiritually by the rituals of Snow Water Grove over the past year. Ar nDraiocht Fein and Snow Water are part of the tradition started by Isaac Bonewits. So I hope that by burning some incense and sending my energy to aid him in his journey to joining the Ancestors, I am giving back a small portion of the support and love I've received from my ADF friends, all of which flowed from Isaac and his great love of the Earth and the traditions of the Druids from long ago.

May you pray by a good fire, sir, and long live the Tradition!

Merry Part and Blessed Be

In Nebraska!

I can't believe I'll have been here 3 weeks as of this Sunday. I've had a few job interviews, and sent out more applications. Keep sending out those positive vibes for me!

I am enjoying exploring my new town. Folks in Lincoln love to eat, there are so many restaurants here, including at least 4 sushi places. I've also had Indian food, and ice cream at Ivanna Cone, which seems to be a Lincoln landmark. I've also been using my Wii Fit again, feeling in a lot better shape than I was when I left New York. And it's been wonderful getting to see my sweetheart on a regular basis. I am indescribably happy.

I am also trying to meet other Pagan/witchy folk in the area. I've checked out the local store, Here and Back Again, and the owners are very nice. The store's second anniversary was last weekend. They had a psychic faire and I had a tarot reading and a photo of my aura taken. It was very interesting and informative.

Merry Part and Blessed Be!

OMG a blog post

I have pretty much abandoned this blog. I did want to let anyone who looks here occasionally, or comes to me by way of other friends' blogs, know that I am moving to Nebraska next month to be near the man I love. I am ecstatically happy about this, though sad to be leaving friends and family.

Merry Part and Blesed Be!

Once a month, and better it be when the moon is full

I shall write a blog post.

(and adore the spirit of Thee, who is Queen of all the Wise)

Elizabeth Barrett Browning quotes

“How do I love thee? Let me count the ways./ I love thee to the depth and breadth and height / My soul can reach, when feeling out of sight / For the ends of Being and ideal Grace.”

“You were made perfectly to be loved - and surely I have loved you, in the idea of you, my whole life long.”

“Whoso loves believes the impossible”

Merry Part and Blessed Be

Full Moon

Goals

1) I procrastinated a bit on this one, but I have exercised the past two days in a row. I've been doing Yoga and other exercise with my Wii Fit.

2) I have cut back on pop, trying to switch to diet when I do want it for the caffeine. I have been drinking more iced tea and green tea. I feel like I'm off to a good start.

3) I have been slacking on creating the ritual, but I've been reading All One Wicca, and finished writing an essay for entrance into the Coven of the Far Flung Net. Will be polishing that up and sending it off today or tomorrow. The full moon is tomorrow, so I still have time to write up something.

4) I am still working on I Will Fear No Evil by Robert Heinlein. I've been playing more World of Warcraft rather than reading more. At least playing WoW though, I do get to interact with other people. It's been fun.

I'm feeling less lonely. I was home all day yesterday and I didn't feel the need to call anyone just to have someone to talk to. I worked out, and had lunch, watched some LOST, and then got online to play WoW at about 8 PM.

Dream

Dream 11/14/2009 waning moon in Scorpio


The dream - A man, older, pretty sure he had a beard, was asking me if I'd ever made a wand. I told him I had, but it was a simple one, nothing like the tools he had. He handed me a large quartz crystal, about 10 inches long, nearly 3 inches in diameter, single terminated at one end, rounded on the other. It was heavy and cool in my hand.

I just remembered this as I was reading All One Wicca. I was reading about different paths that can be taken as your practice and commitment deepens.

I've been focused very much outward lately. Worrying about other people's problems. When I've tried to help others by being there and listening, I end up exhausted, worn out. Focusing inward tends to bring on a feeling of panic. I've been traveling on the weekends so much because I don't like being on my own for hours at a time. The quiet at my little house begins to seem creepy and ominous instead of peaceful.

It's time to start replenishing myself and caring for myself in healthy ways. I need a focus. I told someone once that if there's a hole inside you, you can't fill it up with someone else. You have to fill it with yourself. So I guess it's time for me to listen to my own advice and really start doing that, instead of trying to distract myself and pretend it's not there.

The New Moon is Monday. Goals to accomplish between this New Moon and the next -

1) Start exercising again.
2) Stop drinking pop, thereby cutting my caffeine intake considerably.
3) Create and perform ritual for the Full Moon (the main moon ;-)
4) Read more - requires more active thinking than just watching TV or movies

Wish me luck...

Merry Part and Blessed Be

Haven't done this in a while....

Morning folks! I am blogging this morning from Pittsburgh, which makes it that much cooler. The sky is blue and the sun is shining. It's a gorgeous day.

What I've been up to lately - Been crazy busy at work. Lots of training going on. Have a new hire class starting a week from tomorrow. We've lost a couple people recently. Some I am sorry to see go, the departure of others makes me dance with glee.

I've also been watching Lost via my Netflix account. I'm now 3 episodes into Season 2, so don't tell me anything! But I completely get now why my friend Kelli named her truck Sawyer. I've been going around singing "You All Everybody" for about 2 weeks. Lost rules.

I've been spending a lot of time on Facebook. I can chat on it with a lot of people from work, college and even a few old high school friends. So if you're reading this and you haven't already, sent me a friend request!

I smell bacon, which means it's almost time for breakfast. Which is good because I am starving.

Merry Part and Blessed Be!

Music

Okay, the video is scary because there are clowns in it. But I <3 this song.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7T88NfxVJdc

I said, she heard

Me - I bought a futon!
Allison - You bottled Whose Line?

Yes, I now own a 4th piece of furniture, a futon. I was looking at buying an air mattress, but a good one, with a pump, is about $50. My futon was $139. And it works as a couch, as well as a place for guests to sleep. I don't have to inflate or deflate it, either.

I am working on building it as we speak, I am just waiting on my landlord's son to bring me a phillips head screwdriver. I am taking this break as an opportunity to blog, and to eat some soup.

I'm fighting off a sinus infection. I went to Dr. Owens office today and got an antibiotic. I should be in the clear before I go to Lebanon to visit Lacy, Jay and Breanna.



Isn't she beautiful?

Customer Service Week at work is off to a good start. We had plenty of participation in our Professional Attire dress up day. Tomorrow is Team Jersey day, so I need to decide whether to wear Penguins jersey or my Steelers jersey.

Okay, time to eat, even thought I am not really hungry. I hate being sick.

Merry Part and Blessed Be!

Trueblood

I started watching Trueblood via Netflix last night. I really, really like it. I'm completely hooked on the opening theme. As a fan of the books, I’ve been really pleased with the translation from book to show so far. The first two episodes were about the first third of the first book. I like Anna Paquin as Sookie. I like the guy they have playing Sam, he’s one of my favorite characters in the books. I can't wait to get the next disc.

I wanna do bad things with you...

And it's only Tuesday

Kim's been gone two days, and I'm already beginning to appreciate why I didn't apply for a Team Lead position. There's a lot of organization necessary, and it's very disappointing when people don't do well on a call monitoring. Especially people you know are capable of doing well.

Gearing up for Customer Service Week. Duty calls.

Merry Part and Blessed Be!

I love Pittsburgh

It's been a busy couple of days. On Friday night after work, I drove down to Pittsburgh to visit Grant and Wendy, who I've only seen once since they moved back to PA. I got to meet their pretty birdies, Chloe and Baby. (Chloe likes me okay, Baby thinks I am in some way a threat.) We rented Watchmen, which we had all watched in the theater but wanted to see again. We also watched SuperBad, and McLovin was still the best part. On Sunday we walked around Little Italy because there was a festival. Wendy had some tiramisu and I had Italian ice. My Garmin got me in and out of the city just fine, although I had to trick it a little to get it to take me north on 79 rather than out 28. Taking 28 is shorter, but since I was driving at night, I'd rather stick to the big highways.

I also have a theory that the Steelers aren't winning because I'm not watching the games. I may have to find out how much basic cable is. Most of the games are on CBS or NBC.

Hope everyone is enjoying the fall weather, there's definitely a chill in the air here today and I want a cup of hot apple cider, and a purring black cat in my lap.

Merry Part and Blessed Be!

I had a dream

About being happy. All my friends were near me, we could watch movies or play games together whenever we felt like it. And I was with someone special... it was wonderful to lie in his arms and be loved and cherished. I remember lying in a huge bed, with the sheets and blankets all tangled up around us. A lot of the details are fading, but I remember being happy and scared it wouldn't last.

So I'm in a conundrum this morning. I see a pattern. It's becoming a cycle. And we've tried to break the pattern, but now the attempt to break the pattern is becoming a part of the cycle. I don't want to lose this person. The thought of losing him makes me very unhappy. But at the same time, there's all these reasons we keep trying to stay apart. It's too complicated, we don't have the same goals, our personalities are very different, etc. etc. And at the same time, I love being around him, I love talking to to him. When I have the opportunity, I love touching him and being touched by him. And I don't need him just for the attention, because there are others who tell me I'm beautiful and special. And he's going through some things himself, and I want to be there and help him as a friend.

I find myself wondering if the way to break the pattern is to just suck up my fear, and give it a real try. But I know we're both afraid we'll just fall into a different pattern then, and maybe we'd be content, and neither of us would be looking for the person who will make us truly happy, the person we're meant to spend our lives with. Maybe though, we need to look at why we are continuously drawn back together, rather than all the reasons we try to stay just friends and not more.

Having an oooh, kitty moment: It's Fall. Officially tomorrow, but the temperature at night and the falling leaves in my driveway tells me it's here. In the Wheel of the Year, it's a time for endings making way for new beginnings. It always reminds me of a specific new beginning, the start of the school year. Samhain will be here before I know it. Maybe I can get some good advice then.

Back to the original topic: My wisest counselors are telling me not to jump into things with this friend. I need to respect the decisions he's making for himself and give him space to figure out what he wants. And I fear him wanting me almost as much as I fear him NOT wanting me...

Merry Part and Blessed Be

This is my cat

She is currently sleeping on my lap. More pics when I take 'em

Back from vacation

Full details and pics later, but for now, enjoy this:

Looking ahead, not looking back

Today I go to sign my divorce papers. Then in a little over 110 days, it will be official. Then I can go back to being Suzanne Huffman. Then I can really start my new life.

I can go where I want to go, be who I want to be. I think that's a line in a song... I don't remember which song. Well, it's my song now.

In other cool news, Alison Tyler has put a story of mine up on one of her satellite blogs. This blog, H is for Harlot, exists to showcase longer stories from different challenges or contests she puts on her main blog, Trollop With a Laptop.

Oh, and I also signed up for Netflix. I don't need any suggestions of things to watch though, I already have 70+ items in my queue.

Hope you are having a happy Thursday!

Merry Part and Blessed Be

Tomtember 1st

We pulled a surprise on my amazing boss today. I'm really, really glad he has a good sense of humor. We had a running joke about how he wouldn't wear a Seneca T-shirt for our current promotion. As part of the gag, someone photoshopped his head onto a pic of the t-shirt. Then it escalated to copies of this pic appearing at many many desks in the Call Center.

Today, we all showed up to our meeting wearing T-shirts with the picture. We also provided cake and a card to say how grateful we are that he puts up with our crap everyday.

I have been playing some World of Warcraft again. Tonight I cleared a bunch of things from my bank vault and put them on the auction house. I am hoping to have enough money to get the last part for my Mekgineer's Chopper if all the auctions sell.

Also, I have submitted an entry for Alison Tyler's latest contest. You can check it out here. Once it's up that is, for understandable reasons, AT must approve all comments before they appear on the blog. The contest ends 9/5, so the poll for voting will probably go up 9/6. I'll be in Myrtle Beach at that point, so if you think of it, please go and vote for me.

That's all for tonight, I am going to bed.

Merry Part and Blessed Be!

Sneaky Police!

I got a ticket on my way back to Salamanca from Edinboro today. The cop was on the bridge over the highway, next to the exit. I didn't see him until it was way too late. I didn't even have a chance to slow down and possibly not get hit for as high a speed.

I had a good weekend, Al, Austin and I ate at Max and Erma's in Erie last night. Leftovers from which made an excellent brunch today. I got a couple new shirts. I am excited because I leave for Myrtle Beach in less than 5 days.

I have a lot to do this week to get ready. I want to clean off my desk at work so PTodd doesn't have to look at my squalor while I am gone. I also need to leave my house as clean as possible because I am planning to get a kitten from Kelli shortly after I get back. I don't want to bring her home to a mess. I also want to get my washer hooked up so I don't have to go to the laundromat.

Busy week ahead, but I'm looking forward to it.

My Horoscope for today

From Astrology.com, via IGoogle

"Every now and then, the universe steps in, makes an executive decision, and forces you to take a right when you were absolutely sure you'd be taking a left. This is one of those times, and as sensitive as you are, you'll realize it as soon as you open your eyes this morning. So when you end up someplace you weren't supposed to be anywhere near, chatting with someone you feel an immediate affinity towards, you'll get it. You were supposed to meet."

Today doesn't feel like that day to me, but who knows by the end of it? I've definitely felt that way a lot of days. Like someone is put in your path for a purpose. There are signs, and the universe, Gods, Goddesses, whatever you choose to call them, try to point us in the right direction and teach us, with signs, and advice from friends, etc. But sometimes we're stubborn, or we think we know better than the Gods, and that's when things get taken out of our hands.

I'm reading All One Wicca by Kaatryn MacMorgan-Douglas. It's pretty interesting so far. Very down to earth, easy to read, with a sense of humor.

Church of Universal Eclectic Wicca Affirmation of Faith (can be found in All One Wicca and at the CUEW website)

The Affirmation of Acknowledgment:

I: I acknowledge the presence of other faiths on my planet, indeed, right here in my city/town/village. I acknowledge that the followers of these faiths feel as strongly, maybe more so, than I do about mine.

II: I forgive the other faiths and wipe clean the slate between us. I cannot hold a person responsible for the acts of their faith, I cannot hold a faith at fault for individual practitioners. It is not my place to convert, or otherwise alter a person's religion. I invite discussion of beliefs without judgment of those holding them.

III: I acknowledge that I may be wrong, and I have found comfort in the fact that I may be right.


I personally really like part III. You don't have to be wrong for me to be right. I don't have to stomp what another person believes into the ground for me to take comfort in my faith.

In other news, Duamuteffe has started and Etsy shop. Please check it out!



Buy adorable handmade stuff!

Merry Part and Blessed Be!

Naked Sweat Drips

That's a Scrubs reference, the title. JD is listening to Molly, played by Heather Graham, talk about working out, while he talking to his girlfriend on the phone. He repeats the words "naked sweat drips" and then tries to tell his girlfriend it's a new band he's listening to.

I am covered in sweat drips because I started working out again this morning. I used one of my Yoga DVDs rather than the Wii Fit because apparently I need more AA batteries. I forgot how hard the lower body workout was. And I'm definitely out of shape, I couldn't even pull off a decent Warrior II.

I am thinking about taking a walk, since I woke up early and it's still relatively cool out.

I should also work on some writing this morning, as I have a story submitted at the Fish Tank now that I would like to send to AT before September 1st.

Which is sneaking up on me at an alarming rate! What happened to August? I am hoping I don't just forget all these best laid plans and go back to bed.

That's all for now folks. Merry Part and Blessed Be!